(If you really will miss removing sand from your orifices and clothing and sheets for days on end, I recommend eating mince pies or chips in bed while you watch. Ready-salted chips provide the greatest seaside authenticity. Or you could just explode a beanbag and sit on the filling after turning on your fan heater.)
Scriven's picks for best holiday watching:
Lulu and the Bankrobber
This TV show is a bit like a Danish Outrageous Fortune - if you're not afraid of subtitles, you really should take a look. Lulu is the fond but long-suffering fiancee of Leon, who has a long criminal past and some very dodgy friends and family. When he's arrested just after saying "I do" at their wedding, it's up to Lulu to find out exactly why and save their house from foreclosure. Leon swears he's been framed, but can she really trust him? Cue various encounters with lawyers, Serbian prostitutes, Turkish mobsters, motorcycle gangs, suspicious cops, hormonal teenagers and lots more. By turns scary, funny and touching, you'll want to watch right to the end. If you like this, also try The Bridge.
The Angels' Share
A Ken Loach movie that's a bit more uplifting than usual. A group of Scottish petty crims on a community work programme come up with a plan to get them out of their dead-end lives for good. I won't spoil the plot, but it involves some very rare whisky, some very clever tactics and that fantastic, dark Scottish humour, with Loach's fantastic eye for the realities of British life. A wee gem.
One for the whole family. If you haven't seen it yet, buy it or rent one of our bestseller copies. You've no hope of getting it before April otherwise. Those little minions are back, every bit as yellow, cute and punchy as ever, in a plot that involves former archvillain Gru going undercover to find a mystery nemesis who's stolen a potentially dangerous substance that turns cute little things into violent purple monsters. I think you can guess where this leads...
Argo
Now's your chance to see this, if you haven't. Nailbiting and funny, and beautifully shot, it's the Oscar-winner by Ben Affleck about the 1980 siege of the US embassy in Iran, and how they managed to smuggle some American embassy staff out of the country under cover as Canadian film-makers. Deserves the hype.
Much Ado About Nothing
Haven't seen this yet, but it's by Joss Whedon, he of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and so forth, and I personally can't wait to see what he's done with the play. It was shot over just a few days at Whedon's house, starring a whole bunch of unknown actors, and it's been updated and given the Whedon treatment. It's got great reviews.
Another family movie that's actually a lot better than it sounds. I was a bit dubious about watching a movie with video game characters from the 80s (or pretend ones, anyway) and a villain who wants to be a hero. I mean, it just sounded so cheesy. But it had a lot of heart, some sarcastic humour and some really great chase scenes and I actually thoroughly enjoyed myself. Kids will love it - and maybe you will too.
The Bletchley Circle
Those of you who like Call the Midwife may not have come across this short TV series set during the 1950s. A group of women were codebreakers at Bletchley Park during World War II, and are rather adrift now that the war is over. Until one of them decides to hunt down a serial killer by charting patterns in his behaviour, even when the cops think they're mad. More sisters doing it for themselves.
And if you haven't seen The Hobbit yet, it's probably about time you did. Not Jackson's best, admittedly, but the scenery's fantastic, and Martin Freeman makes it all worth watching. Plus number two is supposed to be pretty awesome, and you won't know who all those people being toasted and eaten are if you haven't seen this. You know you want to see the dragon. So get to it.
